To me it seems fine, though my head seems to mind
Where have all the kind, the crazy, those so called “friends of mine”
Disappeared too, over time? Out of sight out of line, no more invites
This as most things comes as no surprise. After all they were just a disguise
Physical, flesh, anatomical masks behind which I was hiding. Embodying all things I was denying. Literally walking, talking, puddles of lying. Versions of me I was actively declining while simultaneously re-finding, by not complying.
This comes as know surprising thing. Simply, woe I wasn’t releasing.
Alone, lonely & by myself, set the bar low, today I drink from top shelf. I work mandated at leisure, happily accepting earned wealth. Less people, less stress, more time, less weight, table 4-1, it’s my turn to date. Locked in until the end or until there’s nothing on my plate.
This extinguishes pride and with no thing besides me, I’m surprised to see.
I’m not sad nor morose that they’ve since gone, rather grateful, I’m moving beyond. I’m not thrilled nor ecstatic, to be in a place where I’m the only one at it. I wonder though, I wander too, if I’d known then this to be my truth, would I stay all the way through or leave early, after all it’s nothing new.
This, it comes as no surprise to me, that I know surprising things, but it does surprise the mind indelibly that it’s still surprisingly a surprise how deeply I deprived myself all for the validation of broken identities.
Know life, no surprise, face plight, and you just might.